Bullying requires immediate action, expert says
"If we
could all follow the Golden Rule, we wouldn't need bullying prevention. But we
are not in that place. We are at a place where kids need help knowing how to
treat one another," says Dr. Deborah Kipps-Vaughan.
Deborah
Kipps-Vaughan, Psy.D
Assistant Professor
of Graduate Psychology, James Madison University
kippsvdx@jmu.edu
http://www.psyc.jmu.edu/gradpsyc/people/kipps-vaughan.html
Kipps-Vaughan knows
first hand the dangers of bullying. A licensed clinical psychologist, she was
supervisor of psychological services for Halifax County Public Schools before
joining the JMU faculty in 2008. In Halifax County, she was responsible for
training and implementation of a school district bullying prevention program.
Quotes
"Kids are
much more resilient than we are as adults, but at the same time, because peer
acceptance is so, so important, things that we might as adults want them to blow
off, hurt. Kids ruminate about it and damage starts really being done to their
self-esteem."
"You don't
hear much about it, but a key element to understanding bullying is the
bully/victim. That's the individual that has had negative interpersonal
experiences, which is always hard as a kid, has usually a more acceptable
attitude toward hostile behavior or aggression and has less regard for
conventional rules. This understanding can help us recognize kids that need our
attention, and then there are ways to try and work with their thinking and
attitudes. Cognitive behavioral work through some counseling, for
instance."
Once bullying
behavior is identified, Kipps-Vaughan stresses that a comprehensive,
on-the-spot response is necessary. "Whenever we see bullying happen, we
should stop it right away, name the behavior – call it 'bullying.' That's some
of the problem is we don't call things bullying that are bullying. So imbedded
in this piece about naming is we have to be clear about the definition of
'bullying.' It is an act with harmful intention, it is a repeated act and there
is some imbalance of power, such as size or social status."
"Further
critical parts to the comprehensive response are immediate consequences for the
bullying behavior and support for the victim. You have to do all the parts."
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