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The Breeze April Fool’s issues

Headline stories in April 1 issues of The Breeze parodied campus life

By Fred Hilton (’96M)

Today, JMU students continue the parodies and high jinks on You Tube. See the editor's note at the end of the feature for links to some current You Tube offerings.

Implausible events make headlines

Members of the Madison College Class of 1963 fondly remember that spring day in their senior year when First Lady Jacqueline Kennedy visited campus.

Another famous visitor came to campus in 1974. Less than a year after resigning as vice president of the United States, Spiro T. Agnew joined the political science department to teach courses on constitutional law and federal income tax.

April Fool's edition of The Breeze

An Apri Fool's edition of The Breeze. Photo courtesy Tony Madsen.

And, no one in the Class of 1981 will ever forget when those lovable cut-ups from ROTC blew up Wilson Hall.

Those three implausible events have one thing in common: they were all headline stories in an April 1 issue of The Breeze.

Off and on for nearly 60 years, editors of the JMU student newspaper temporarily abandoned regular journalism and produced broad parodies that ridiculed everything from the school’s administration to movie stars to campus life.

Jokes mirrored changing times

The first April Fool’s issue, titled The Sneeze, hit campus in 1927, five years after The Breeze first appeared on campus. (Two later versions of the issue also renamed The Breeze: The Flurry in 1938 and The Spaz in 1981.)

The humor in the first April Fool’s issue was pretty mild. Many of the stories were printed upside-down and the jokes were gentle, such as the report that distinguished professor Raymond C. Dingledine had won the National Chewing Gum Championship.

The newspaper issues mirrored changing times on college campuses and ever-increasing student autonomy. While the satire was tame in the early years, it got one sharper and more pointed by the 1970s and 1980s with the staff pushing the envelope more than once.

Celebrities and national figures were particular favorites of The Breeze editors.

In 1938, horror film master Boris Karloff was listed as the guest speaker for the Psychology Club on “Child Psychology as Applied to the Younger Generation.” The most risqué musical group of the ’60s, “The Hot Nuts,” was announced for a campus visit to demure Madison College in 1961.

The 1977 issue contained a parody of the National Inquirer titled the National Perspirer. Its cover promised an article by calorie-challenged megastar Elizabeth Taylor on “Anorexia Special: How to Gain Weight Without Eating.” Another on “Why I Like to Photograph Young Children” was attributed to movie director and convicted child molester Roman Polanski.

Agnew’s old boss, Richard M. Nixon, was named dean of JMU’s College of Fine Arts and Communications in 1978. Harrisonburg celebrity/basketball star Ralph Sampson appeared in two April Fool’s issues. In 1978, the JMU was renamed Ralph Sampson University to convince the high school phenom to enroll. The next year, Madison basketball coach Lou Campanelli sold his soul to the Devil in a deal to recruit Sampson.

First April Fool's edition of The Breeze was titled The Sneeze

The first April Fool’s issue, titled The Sneeze, hit campus in 1927, five years after The Breeze first appeared on campus.Photo courtesy Tony Madsen.

That most favorite of all liquid refreshments for generations of JMU students, beer, figured prominently in several April Fool’s issue of The Breeze. The 1963 issue said that beer machines were being installed on campus. The 1978 version said that breweries were planned for dorms and also reported that beer can shaped UFOs had landed on campus.

The next year a new brand of beer, “Ronnie’s Beer,” was unveiled in honor JMU President Ronald E. Carrier. Madison presidents were a special target of April Fool’s issues.

President G. Tyler Miller agreed to give students two months’ spring vacation in 1954 after he was threatened in his office by a gun-wielding masked woman. Miller went along with the gag and even posed facing the intruder with his hands high in the air.

Uncle Ron a frequent favorite

Known as Uncle Ron to students over three decades, Carrier appeared in many April Fool’s editions. In the 70s and 80s, Carrier was frequently mentioned as a potential political candidate. The Breeze said that he was running:

  • For president of the United States in 1976 with basketball star and future coach Sherman Dillard as his running mate.
  • For governor of Virginia in 1977, with a campaign pledge to increase the state’s population to 10 billion by 1987. (Rapidly growing enrollment was a big issue with students.)
  • For president of the Student Government Association in 1980.

The Breeze also reported in 1977 that Carrier had been named president of Yale University.

Many of the parodies and satires in the issues defied categorization.

  • At the height of the Cold War in 1955, an atomic test was scheduled for campus.
  • In 1975, it was announced that a World Football League team, nicknamed the Turkeys, would locate in Harrisonburg.
  • The school was sold to Nielsen Construction Co. in 1977.
  • In 1978, a front page headline that the issue contained The Breeze’s First Annual Swimsuit Issue. On an inside page there were definitely several pictures of swimsuits. No models, just swimsuits.
  • Latimer-Shaeffer Theatre was renamed in 1979 in honor of Phoef Sutton, an accomplished student actor and future successful Hollywood playwright/director. Sutton also played all the roles in a production of Oklahoma.
  • The 1980 issue pushed two politically incorrect buttons. It was revealed that JMU was the only college in Virginia that did not offer free sex-change operations. In addition, a Gay Task Force was formed to search JMU closets for gays.
  • Duke Dog was usurped in 1981 and a koala bear was named as JMU’s new mascot. April Fool’s issues ended after the 1982 issue. The Breeze editors felt that the comic relief of the issue was inconsistent with their efforts to produce a professional newspaper.

Professionalism wins out

Chris Kouba (’83) was editor of The Breeze when the final April Fool’s issue was produced and again the following year, when it disappeared. He recalled that “the staff in general was very focused on producing a professional-quality newspaper … Frankly, putting out a really good paper that students read was pretty fun in itself, and for some reason, trying to force being funny just seemed like extra work that year.”

The Breeze editors in 1987 discussed bringing the issue back but decided against it because of “legal issues.”

The April Fool’s issues probably weren’t very professional. And they certainly would make the lawyers nervous. But they sure were funny.

Editor's note: While The Breeze April Foolery stopped in 1982, JMU students still have a sense of humor — the high jinks continue on You Tube. Follow these links to see more:

Prank at JMU

JMU Fight Song

Michael Phelps visits JMU

What your tour guide didn't tell you about JMU

About the author

JMU historian Fred D. Hilton, served James Madison University steadfastly as head of its media and public relations efforts for more than 32 years.